Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Don't Shoot the Pharmacist

I mentioned robberies in one of my previous posts, and whenever I work, the thought of  being robbed, and what would I do, and could I handle it, is in the back of my mind. When I unlock the narcotics cabinet, I do a scan of the methadone, the morphine, and the oxymorphone, and I go through the scenario in my mind. Get one of the large plastic bags, talk about every move I am making, go over to the narcotics cabinet, unlock it and sweep everything into the bag. Walk quickly back to the counter and hand the robber the bag and hope that he leaves.

I profile people. I know, it's not politically correct and it's not 100% accurate, but when you've been doing this as long as I have, it pays to trust your instincts. I have had a few little old lady and little old men addicts, but I'm fairly certain that they don't have the desire or the inclination to pull a handgun on me. However, their no 'count grandson or granddaughter might.

From the news stories and the accounts given by pharmacists I know that have been robbed, the first thing that happens is the robber hands you a note. They usually have a gun, and sometimes it is hidden and sometimes they display it. One pharmacist told me the guy actually put the gun on the counter and conducted an impromptu therapy session, telling her all about his hard life and all his problems and how he wasn't going to hurt her, but his life was just so tough right now. There was another robbery in our district where the robber put the gun on the counter, but this time the pharmacist swatted the gun away, jumped the counter, and tackled the guy. We cheered for him when we heard about it, then we feared for his job.

According to the official robbery handbook, we are not to try to be a ''hero''. Since most of us are not combat ready, it is more likely that we would escalate the situation than save ourselves and the other people in the store. However, it does not tell us what to do if one of us is taken hostage, or if the robber starts shooting, or if he jumps the counter and holds a gun to our head. If  I saw a chance, and thought I had the ability to disarm the guy, I would worry about not getting killed first, and then look for another job, if need be.

We are not allowed to carry concealed weapons, although some pharmacists do and it doesn't become apparent until they need to use them. I know a guy who wore a bulletproof vest on the night shift. It cost him over $600, and he said it was hot and uncomfortable, but it made him feel more secure. Of course I had to mention the fact that it would do him no good if they shot him in the head. I'm helpful like that.

We are still allowed to sell needles over the counter. Back in the day we also could sell Schedule V cough syrup 4 ounces at a time with a signature. I have gone back and forth, sometimes I would sell them and sometimes not. These days I don't sell them without a prescription, unless I know the patient, or the person is from out of town but can tell me their insulin type and how many units they use. We have questions we use to parse out the bullshitters from the legitimate patients, although sometimes if I'm busy and don't want to screw with it, I just tell them ''no''.

''My poor old granny is diabetic and she sent me in to get her some needles.''

''Ok, did she say how many units of insulin she uses, or what size syringe? Or, if you want, we can call her and ask her so you make sure and get the right ones.''

''No, Granny doesn't have a phone and she can't hear (or write???) and I think she uses the 100 cc syringes, so just give me those.''

''Oh really. Is your Granny a pachyderm, because otherwise I'm not selling you the damn syringes!'''

I have found out through the years that the druggie grapevine must be pretty efficient, because every time I have lost my mind and sold needles against my better judgement, within hours there are a raft of people suddenly needing syringes. They come out of the woodwork. My opinion is that the less of these people I have in my store, the safer the rest of us are. Most of these people are down on their luck and either desperate or unstable. Some pharmacists think that if we make them happy, they will go away. My experience has always been the opposite, so I would rather stand up to one scary person than 10 of his friends.

One story told to me by an older pharmacist illustrates my point. Years ago, pharmacists could sell laudanum over the counter. Laudanum (tincture of opium) contains approximately 10% powdered opium by weight, so people would boil it down in a spoon and inject it. Apparently there was a pharmacist who took to carrying the stuff by the gallon in order to keep up with the demand in his neighborhood. The folly of his ways became clear when a guy came in with a gun, told him to kneel down by the safe and open it, and then shot him in the head.

I think that there should be one or two stores per district that carry the narcotics for the whole area. Admittedly, this would be very inconvenient for cancer patients and other patients with chronic pain, or even for patients who have an acute need for narcotic pain medications. These stores should have an armed guard on duty, metal detectors at the door, and bulletproof glass enclosing the pharmacy. Not very professional or personable, but neither is getting shot or roughed up.

In conclusion, let me say that this is yet another thing I didn't envision when I was in pharmacy school. I don't remember Robbery 101 being in the curriculum. So, keep in mind that when I seem tense and nervous when I wait on you, it's most likely not you, but the ever-increasing horror show I have going on in the back of my mind that I can't seem to switch off anymore.

Pleasant dreams!!

BP






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